


sit with me (and look up at the stars)

by MusicalLuna



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Astronomy, Astronomy nerd Tony Stark, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, New York, Oblivious Steve Rogers, POV Natasha Romanov, Protective Natasha Romanov, Supportive Avengers, Team as Family, Tony Stark Feels, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-19
Updated: 2016-12-19
Packaged: 2018-09-09 17:36:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8904820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MusicalLuna/pseuds/MusicalLuna
Summary: Natasha wants to protect her friends from the things that haunt them--that can be difficult when they decide to face their demons head-on.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fantalaimon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fantalaimon/gifts).



Natasha takes notice the minute Tony clears his throat, his fingers playing with the condensation on his glass. He's nervous for some reason. It's not often that he gets nervous when he's talking to them these days.

Natasha glances at Clint, who looks back at her; he's noticed, too. He gives a minute shrug and chews on the straw from his drink.

“So, ah,” Tony says, and Steve looks up from his plate, licking grease off his fingertips. Tony doesn't even notice, and that's even more concerning. What's going on in that head of his?

“Go on,” Natasha prompts when he seems to get stuck.

Tony flashes a look at her and his tongue flits over the corner of his mouth. Steve notices. His eyes darken. “Hey, so—let's go do something.”

“Did you have something in mind?” Bruce asks.

Tony shrugs, but his eyes slip sideways at the last second. “Let's see where we end up.”

Natasha narrows her eyes at him. There's something specific, she knows.

They all agree, though, so they troop downstairs and pile into a limo. Thor leans between the gap and hands Happy a slice of pizza from their lunch.

“Take us for a spin, Hap,” Tony calls.

“You got it, Boss.”

So Happy's in on whatever this is.

They drive around for awhile, seemingly aimless, but while they shout at Clint not to get himself beheaded when he sticks his entire upper body out the sunroof, and while they talk about whether or not Thor should learn how to swim, Tony inches closer and closer to Steve until he's practically sitting on top of him. Steve holds his hand and doesn't seem to notice anything is amiss. Natasha wants to slap him.

Since deciding to try and fill her life up with people and deciding to try and trust them even when she's not sure it won't blow up in her face, Natasha has become extraordinarily invested in the happiness and well-being of those select people. It can be exasperating in cases like this, when they're both people she cares about.

Given Tony's demeanor, she's not terribly surprised when they pull up to the curb in front of the Hayden Planetarium.

“How about here, Boss?” Happy asks, like this wasn't the plan all along.

Tony's eyes are fixed out the window. Bruce has apparently cottoned on, because he's staring at Tony with a concerned crease in his brow. Tony licks his lips and says, “What do we say, gang?”

“Where are we?” Steve asks, peering outside as well.

“The Hayden Planetarium,” Natasha replies, trying to get his attention with just her voice. He's too busy gawking to notice.

“ _This_ is what they did with the planetarium? Wow. Yeah, I'm in.”

“Aye, Midgardian science is always quaint.”

“Sure,” Bruce says, but he's still giving Tony a probing look as he says it.

An expression that's a combination of nerves and determination overtakes Tony's face when they start piling out of the car.

Natasha isn't entirely sure why he's doing this to himself—he reacts...badly whenever someone mentions wormholes (usually Jane, although she's gotten better about it) or when viewing an unobstructed starfield.

He'd been devastated when they tried to catch Steve up on Star Wars and he had to duck out to hide that he was having a panic attack. Of course Steve hadn't been about to sit and watch a movie after Tony all but sprinted out of the room and that was when he'd finally told them all about how badly he was _actually_ handling New York.

Before that, they'd teased him about bringing up flying the nuke through the wormhole. They haven't since.

Steve keeps a tight grip on Tony's hand as they climb the stairs and head inside, so that's good at least.

Once they're inside, Tony seems to relax a little. Probably because there are kids everywhere and Natasha knows when Tony's having a hard time he volunteers at schools because being around kids makes him feel better.

Bruce sidles up to her as they head inside toward the exhibits. “Did you know he wanted to do this?”

Natasha sighs. “No.”

Bruce frowns, expression sad. “I thought we'd made it clear to him that there's nothing wrong with suffering from anxiety after a thing like that.”

“Apparently not clear enough.”

“Are we having a 'what the fuck is Stark thinking?' pow-wow?” Clint asks, slinging an arm around Bruce's shoulders.

“We have weird pow-wows,” Bruce sighs.

“Yes,” Natasha says. “We need to keep an eye on him. If he starts to struggle—”

Clint starts ticking off points on his fingers. “We know the techniques, we can get him breathing right, steer him away from the trigger, remind him it's a panic attack and he's going to be fine.”

“Steve hasn't noticed anything is wrong. He might need to be beaten with a clue stick.”

“The guy can be really dense,” Clint sighs.

“Hey, what are you guys doing?” Steve calls. “C'mon!”

“Go team!” Clint cheers sarcastically as they move to catch up.

It goes well while they take in the Cosmic Pathway. Astronomy isn't really something Tony works with, but he's learned about it extensively and seems to be in his element here, elaborating on the information given by the posted signs. Then they get in line for the show in the dome and he starts to get nervous again.

Natasha gets suspicious. “Tony, which of these shows are we seeing?”

“Ah.” His eyes dart around the room. “... _Black Holes, Wormholes, and the Movies._ ”

“Perhaps there is another show we should view,” Thor says, frowning.

Tony swallows, but his expression turns defiant. “No, I want to see that one.”

“Tony knows more about this than any of us,” Steve says. “I'm sure the movie he picked will be interesting.”

Natasha bites the inside of her cheek. It will be _very_ interesting.

The five of them are very quiet when the line is allowed to file into the theater. Natasha catches Tony by the sleeve and murmurs quietly, “You don't have to do this.”

Tony glances back at her, his mouth pulled into a thin, tense line. “What if I want to?”

Natasha squeezes his arm. “Then remember we're with you.”

Tony smiles wanly. “Why do you think I roped you guys into this?”

“ _Durachok_ ,” Natasha grumbles.

She settles into the seat on Steve's left, prepared to climb over him if necessary. Out of the corner of her eye, she sees Thor put his hand on Tony's knee and he gets another flash of that wan smile.

Natasha can't help keeping an eye on Tony even as the lights go down and the show begins. He's stiff in his seat, the light of the projections casting sharp shadows on his face. She doesn't like that he's doing this to himself, even if she knows he wants this part of his life back.

It goes well until the portion of the show about wormholes starts and a grainy, but full sized image of the New York wormhole appears overhead. She sees his chest jerk, and his hand clenches around Steve's so tight she can see it go white even in the dim. Before she can elbow Steve, he leans toward Tony, tipping his head down so his mouth is level with Tony's ear. Beyond them, she can see Clint, Thor, and Bruce all turned to look.

She doesn't know what Steve says, but Tony closes his eyes and grips his hand and slowly but surely, his breath evens out.

After, when they've exited the theater and Tony excuses himself to go to the bathroom, Natasha bumps Steve with her hip. “What did you say to him?” she asks. “I didn't even think you realized.”

Steve huffs and rubs the back of his head. “I didn't. Not until we were in line.” He grimaces. “I wish I'd realized sooner.” Then he sighs, “Or maybe I don't.” His mouth twists wryly. “Tony said he appreciated that I didn't fuss. And in the movie, all I said was, 'I'm right here.'”

Tony emerges and he smiles at them, a small, shy thing.

“That we are,” Natasha says.


End file.
